New beginnings…

9 05 2013

There are four days left in the semester which seems super super crazy to me. This is my next to last semester as an undergraduate. I honestly remember being a young freshman excited to start college and it seemed like it would be forever before I graduated. Then being frustrated as a sophomore because it seemed like it’d take forever and I was swamped, same with my one semester of being a junior, and then bam now I’m a senior. Wow!

Obviously I’m starting a new chapter in my life as far as graduating from college and being completely financially independent from my parents and all. I’ve already been financially independent for a year and it seems crazy that that has happened. Ah! I filed taxes this year for the first time, applied for an apartment instead of living in the dorms, got my own cell phone plan, and all sorts of other exciting things. I have six hours left to take next semester which is crazy for me to think about, because it is definitely ten hours less than my normal sixteen hours. I will be the first child in my immediate family to get their bachelor’s degree! Milestone!

Easter came and went about a month ago and I actually ended up going to four different church services throughout the weekend.  It was funny because before Sunday the two services I went to were rather solemn because they were taking the viewpoint of Christ’s suffering and having an attitude of penance in the midst of our humanness. But come Sunday the other two church services were joyful with the idea of Jesus’ resurrection because that honestly is the pinnacle of Christianity, or at least the faction I believe in. Without that, there really isn’t any point for Jesus, religion etc… Therefore Easter is an important day and a very joyous occasion, pointing to new beginnings for everything.

Just before Spring Break I chopped all my hair off, in preparation for the summer, for a new look I haven’t had since I was fifteen, and I felt it kind of marked the new chapter of my life I am about to begin.  So it was symbolic and practical at the same time.

An idea I have and I don’t know if it will work but we will see… is to move to Houston after I graduate! I’m not going to name off all of my reasons for wanting to go there but at least the idea gives me something great to look forward to rather than just thinking ‘staying in Lubbock and working’.  I love new places, new adventures, and it would be fun to make that the city where I can mark as my after graduation spot.  As Lubbock was my after graduating high school spot. But looking at the practical aspect… I would need a job and a car, but I believe if it’s a good plan all of that will work itself out by the time I would be going to Houston. 

So cheers to new life, new beginnings and new chapters in life!

Song I’m loving

Rihanna – Stay

Meryl Streep – The Winner Takes It All

The Script – Hall of Fame



25 04 2013

Today has been interesting but I figured might as well make a blogpost about it since I have time.  I am currently working on a big blogpost about new beginnings, graduation, my new haircut, Easter and how it all goes together.

Today we had a conducting assessment where we had to conduct the entire piece through (Waldesnacht by Brahms if you want to look it up), which we normally do for assessments but then we were supposed to have a mini rehearsal and teach a small portion of the piece. Conducting for me is rather difficult, as is public speaking.  But I can get myself through both of these things, just not at the same time. I took this conducting class because conducting is something very intimidating to me and I knew I’d learn a lot and grow as a person and a musician. So today after I conducted the whole piece I was supposed to start talking, but I was so nervous and I couldn’t find my voice and ended up crying instead.  Thankfully my conducting teacher is very nice and very encouraging so she let me leave and compose myself and when I came back I did the teaching portion of it and it went over very well.  It’s funny because the portion I ended up teaching was one that I changed last minute while I was composing myself in the bathroom.  Either way it ended up fine.

Then in my next class, we had presentations [don’t worry mine is next class period] and one group chose to interview religious leaders and talk about that. I wasn’t so hip with their presentation because religion is something way more complex than just a 30 minute presentation covering six different religions.  I’m not good at speaking up in class but I’m not sure what I would have said about it.  For the Christianity section they interviewed one of the pastors from the Experience Life now church since it is non-denominational.  For starters, Experience Life now is not a good church to pick to interview because it’s the hip college church.  Also non-denominational churches really are a denomination even though they claim they aren’t.  The girl giving the presentation ragged on Christianity also because “it’s not open to other religions”… People. Facepalm. Just no. It’s the whole openmindedness bullshit.  You can’t be openminded… the fact that you are against closemindedness already makes you not openminded.

On a side note.. I took a few political and religious quizzes and determined that I most closely fall toward Libertarian and Southern Baptist so that’s what I put in my About Me on Facebook.

This has been a fuss [for the record a fuss is a shorter rant].

Songs I’m loving

David Guetta – She Wolf

Maroon 5 – Daylight

Mackelmore – Thrift Store

Les Miserables…

2 04 2013

I haven’t written in a month… basically it went like this “ooh I should write about this” and then I never actually wrote about it.  I blame my roommate for being so awesome and making me want to hang out with her instead of running off to the library all the time. But I did want to talk about the Les Mis movie…

I saw it in theaters over winter break after touring the Holocaust museum… but it was such a wonderful movie.  It doesn’t depict everybody having a happily ever after and getting rich at the end, and the “heroic actions” by the characters aren’t huge superhuman things. It’s simple things anyone can do.  I watched the first half of it a week ago, especially since I was in a not so great mood.  It’s amazing that such a “depressing” movie actually makes me feel better. The fact that it is completely music may or may not be a factor in that… Also the song “One Day More” struck me because it’s pretty much every character believing that they are doing the thing that’s right and pleasing to God.  For me it is one of those seeing the whole picture kind of things which I really like.  There was the big political broo ha ha over the Supreme Court’s review of Proposition 8 and DOMA, also Brother Jed the radical preacher was on campus so students were in a fuss over that also. I’m not really into the whole political/spiritual politics debate drama so I felt all out of sorts but seeing the movie helped me feel less emotional with the aspect of, everyone thinks they are right and will go to all sorts of lengths to prove that.

A few quotes that stood out to me…

“To love another person is to see the face of God.”

“Here’s the thing about equality. Everybody’s equal when they are dead.”

“Truth is given to us by God in our time, in our turn.”

“Tomorrow we’ll discover what our God in heaven has in store.”

These might be the cliche quotes but I really like them.  What did y’all think of the movie?

Songs I’m Loving

Anne Hathaway – I Dreamed a Dream

Samantha Banks – On My Own

Les Miserables cast – One Day More

2 04 2013

Check this out! My friend is blogging about his adventures walking across Texas

The Long Walk South


 While reading the “Uphill Road to Grace: Some Pilgrimages” from our assigned text Wanderlust I began to wonder what a pilgrimage of my own would be like (45-63). Wanderlust: The History of Walking, by Rebecca Solnit is not a novel, it is a collection of essays all concerning the subject of walking, but this chapter, “Uphill Road to Grace: Some Pilgrimages” is specifically about spiritual walks to spiritual sights, and the physical hardship that is involved with a walk of a significant distance. I am not a spiritual man, however, the value of a trying and difficult task I find intensely interesting. I think of Gandhi and his march the sea, or Caesar Chavez and his hunger strike. The infliction of hardship on the body to expand the mind does not require a god to pay homage to, only a will to overcome, and transcend the physical form.  As…

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The past two weeks…

24 02 2013

I did not jump back on the weekly challenge band wagon which I am okay with. The past two weeks have felt crazy, and I can hardly believe it is two weeks til spring break, the halfway point of the semester. This semester is flying by, but in a very good way.

I’ve been thinking tonight how precious the very idea of life is. I was reading about a girl I know whose older brother died several years ago. That is the second girl I have met that has had that happened where the older brother died leaving them the only child left. I wonder how that affects family dynamics. For that matter I know a lot of people who have two kids with a male and a female in that order. I wonder what our family would have been like if they had stopped at me, and it was just me and my older brother. Things would be very different especially when it comes to the role I play in the family. I feel like one of the oldest children that has many younger siblings that look up at the behavior I model and a lot of my life choices reflect that. How different would my life be if I was the youngest child with just an older brother to look up to? Would that make me more or less of a family person? Just things I’ve been wondering… I know I do not appreciate my older brother as much as I should. Our relationship has been kind of strained and we’ve inadvertently taken some time spent not talking to each other which in the long run I think it was a good thing. Over the break we had a long conversation which I feel is a step in the right direction toward reconciliation. I’m trying to think of it in Baby steps.

Songs I’m loving:
Brandi Carslile – The Story
Beach Boys – Wouldnt It Be Nice
Fredric Chopin – Nocturne No. 20 in c# minor

Thankful list…

4 02 2013

When I went home for the break, I remember having a day where it felt like everything was wrong with the world. My friend Lauren told me to make a list of ten things I was thankful for even if they were super minor things.  This list is a couple of months old but I decided to share it here… maybe it will inspire you to make your own list.

1. Knowing how precious air conditioning is because the air conditioning didn’t work one summer.

2. The fact that I have a way to travel 5 hours home to be with my family… Cuz a couple times I’ve gotten really close to being stranded at school

3. I’m thankful for the fact that I have the opportunity to go to a huge university and get an education.

4. My whole family is healthy.

5. As a family we stick together and love each other.

6. We have unlimited Internet.

7. We have enough warm bodies and blankets to always stay warm.

8. Right now there are six of us on my moms bed which is a California king. We are allenjoying each others company.

9. I have the opportunity to spend a lot of time with my mom when I am at home. When I wrote the list she was in bed with a hurt back and we just hung out in bed all day with each other.

10. Having two working cars that can take us where we need.

Last weekend….

3 02 2013

I hate putting titles on things. Hence the reason my blog post titles aren’t that exciting.

Anyway just wanted to put some thoughts into writing about last weekend.

So basically it was my birthday weekend, and Philip was supposed to come up here and be here for that. He had kidney stones that didn’t pass so he had his surgery about the time that his flight was supposed to be landing in Lubbock.  I was super bummed but then…

…one of my friends was in a car wreck that was supposed to be at our birthday gathering. Usually when I hear about car wrecks that involves someone my age it’s usually someone I don’t know, or I only heard about it from a friend who knows them personally. This one really affected me because it involved somebody that I knew, and the passenger who died was someone that my friend had told me about so in a way I felt like I knew her.

I went to see my friend in the hospital and a few things that stand out in my mind…

The first thing he said when he saw me was Happy Birthday, and told me that he was going to be there which to me most people who’ve been in a wreck where they were rushed to the hospital they would not have even thought about that, and honestly if you were in a wreck we all understand why you weren’t there.

I ended up listening to his dad talk about what had happened and it sticks out in his mind about how he kept repeating that it was very sad but there is a reason through all of this.

When I was talking to my friend he brought up the female passenger who he knew rather well and the way he talked her death, he focused more on how her family is and he wished she didn’t suffer rather than focus on how all of this will affect him.

Also the girl’s family had visited right before I got there and they told him that their number one priority was him healing. That was amazing to me how they approached the situation without condemnation, anger or bitterness.

Either way it was a weekend that really put into perspective what is important in life to me. I can sit there and feel like Philip not being there is a complete weekend downer or just be glad that he is alive, that he is doing fine and is safe. A girl who didn’t make to my birthday gathering apologized profusely and my thoughts honestly were, it doesn’t matter. You are safe and that is what matters.

At the end of the day I declare, God is good. Next week I plan to return to regular programming of weekly challenges.

Songs I’m loving

Bruno Mars – Locked Out Of Heaven

Family Force 5 – Cray Button

Linkin Park – Burn It Down

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