I came home for the semester. Really if I look at my life I can’t complain. I’m so grateful to be home with my family and just being able to relax and be around them… Like if I look at events that happened in my week it’s all bad things but honestly I say my week has been awesome. I broke up with Aron over Thanksgiving. It’s weird to be home now and not seeing him all the time. We ran into him at the movies, which I wasn’t ready for so I ended up crying a little bit but then we met up in person and talked about things. The main thing I am grateful for is that it’s not just me saying “oh this is over” but he sees why it is not working out. He was so very mature about things and that is the main reason I love him so much. Nobody played the blame game except on ourselves. There are a couple things I’m still thinking about, but it was really good and brought some nice closure. If you want more details you’d have to ask me in person. I just mentioned it here because it’s important to me.
My sister and I watched the new music video for Katy Perry’s song “The One That Got Away”. Basically they dated for a while and then they broke up. He’s driving along and he opens his visor, something of hers falls out and he ends up distracted and drives off a cliff. Yes I started crying because at the moment that hit way too close to home. I don’t know why Allie started crying but it was this weird surreal moment sitting in the library watching that happen. Now of course that song makes me cry everytime I hear it. STUPID SONG.
A couple days ago we exchanged gifts as a family, because we always do it on Hannukah. We do the menorah, typical Jewish food and decorate in blue and white. I love the Hannukah tradition so much. Every other part of my extended family does Christmas, but this is something different and special. We aren’t even Jewish.
My brother’s fiancee came to our family Hannukah celebration, because he couldn’t make it. Because of past events I feel super awkward and uncomfortable around her, but yesterday I made small talk instead of just being awkward and quiet so I think that’s progress. They are getting married in 10 days, and there is so much drama surrounding the wedding and stuff, but everything will be okay. I’m just taking a step back and laughing at it all and helping my mother deal. Again I just mentioned things here because it’s important to me.
I am reading a lot over the break. So far I’ve read Just Listen by Sara Dessen and Let It Snow by several authors. Allie recommended Let It Snow. I really wasn’t in the mood for a romance but this actually was a really nice one and wasn’t weird and cheesy. It was three different stories but they all intertwined which I love that about stories because you get to see different people’s perspective in stories.
With Just Listen, I’ve read that before and I consider it my favorite book because I identify with the main character. This time I actually identified not only with the main character but the two siblings she has as far as certain attributes with them. What about the main character do I identify with? This time I was reading through and seeing how she lost friends because she stopped talking to them. She assumed that those friends were mad at her but they weren’t it was huge miscommunication. That happens to me a lot. I lose friends not because there was a true falling out, just because both parties assume the other is mad because I stop talking to people. Also the whole factor as far as “being nice” instead of honest with people. That’s something I’ve seen myself doing all semester. I’m going to work on fixing that this semester and I’m going to buy myself a copy of that book just to use it as a reference point.
You. Go read the book. Tell me what you think. I’m interested in your thoughts about it. The current book I am reading is Jane Lynch’s biography.
Songs I love:
Linkin Park – Numb
Katy Perry – The One That Got Away
Disciple – Backstabber