It is the month of March. Spring is so close to being here that I can almost taste it, but not quite of course. I hate that moment. I really really really really really want Spring Break to be here. I need to get away from people and I just need to talk to my family in general. Also I’ll get to see Philip for a little over Spring Break. I will not have seen him for two months so that will be extra nice. I’m planning on mom making me something to bring back. Possibly more almond roca?? I don’t know if that is something that it’s too hot to have or whatever but it’d be really nice. I also have a tiny list of people I want to try and make sure to see. If not then that’s cool but I’d really like to. I’d also just like to get some sleep around people I feel completely comfortable with. Nothing against my roommate, it’s just not the same as being home and sleeping with my siblings.
Nothing a huge deal has happened this past month. It’s more of just trying to get through things and survive. Not as in I’m drowning under things, just trying to get through things and not have a completely terrible attitude about it. It seems to get harder come each semester. I’m working this semester to identify people who bring me up and concentrate on seeing them when my mood is less than spectacular. I’ve also been identifying people who bring me down and I’ve been seeing them in smaller doses. It’s not that I can’t see them at all, I just know now when I can see them and when I need to chill a bit and avoid them. Stress management basically.
Right now, the main strategy that I came up with, thanks to Mackenzie… Is to make sure to eat regularly, sleep regularly and shower regularly. That helps a LOT. Normally when I’m not feeling so great or I’m feeling super down, I just avoid those three things because I don’t feel like eating, or sleeping or getting in the shower. But I’ve been keeping up with all of this pretty well.
I’ve identified that I absolutely abhor the question “What are you doing?” That makes me think three times as long to give a careful answer. That one is too easy for people to be like “oh you aren’t busy so we have to do something”. I never ever ever ever answer that I’m doing nothing. That way I at least can be doing something if I want to answer no. Because the people that usually ask “What are you doing?” are the type of people that would demand an explanation if I said no I didn’t want to. Usually an explanation is just complicated and weird and I’d have to make up reasons and so I’d just rather avoid the situation all together.
“Smile like you’ve got nothing to prove no matter what you might do, there is always someone out there cooler than you.” That is from the Ben Folds song There Is Always Someone Cooler Than You. I like the song because it speaks
about not thinking you are all that. It speaks about other things but I really really really like that first line.
The funny thing is that Philip always would talk about how great of a pianist is and I would always fuss and say how terrible he was, just to piss Philip off. But now that I actually listen, I love his music. Of all things.
Songs I love:
Ben Folds – There Is Always Someone Cooler Than You
Ben Folds – Rent A Cop
Ben Folds – Army